*Apostles of our Age*

Well, there's a problem. I've drank 4 beers, 5 margaritas and not a glimmer of blur has seeped into my vision. Sure, my guts getting warm, and those voices, well I can't understand a word they're saying, but the eyesight is 20/20. I'm not sure what this means. I know there's beer all over the walls of the apartment, maybe the walls are stealing my buzz, but i'm not a wall so how would I know. Either way the lack of intoxication isn't really what's puzzling me right now. It's a camping stove. A small hunk of stainless steal about the size of a baby's fist and a bright red fuel tank that attaches snugly to its side like a pair of siamese angels. You see, I'm going all alone into the wilderness for 5 days straight on Thursday and this stove is to be the only way i cook my food amongst the wild deer and noisy rattlesnakes. The only thing is that: thanks to a conglomerate of oversized dickholes who enjoyed flying planes into all the wrong places in search of 1,000 bronzed skin virgins and a cult of retaliatory politicians who fell into their trap, it is near impossible for me to take that precious little stove on my flight into the middle of nowhere. Oh well, I'm 98% chimp, there's still instincts in these soon to be 22 year old bones, I'll find a way to survive in the bush. one thing I won't find though, is a fucking computer, or if one does happen to be poking its head out at the sun through the rabbit holes and redwood canopy, there definitely won't be a jack to plug it into, unless it's moonpowered. Fat chance of that. Either way this poor young blog cries at the thought of prolonged neglect, and being its faithful caretaker i just can't let that be. notice how things aren't capitalized anymore. i fear the vision's narrowing down to 10/10. but that's irrelevant for the proposed purposes of this entry. after all i'm just going to be writing what's already been written. the following are a few excerpts of wisdom from a few of those who have touched me along the way. this is definitely not a representative sample, but it's enough to last 5 days of inaction. enjoy.


From: In Watermelon Sugar

A Love, a Wind

We made long and slow love. A wind came up and the windows trembled slightly, the sugar set fragilely ajar by the wind.
I liked Pauline's body and she said that she liked mine, too, and we couldn't think of anything to say.
The wind suddenly stopped and Pauline said, "What's that?"
"It's the wind."

Jack Kerouac: On The Road

And for just a moment I had reached the point of ecstasy that I always wanted to reach, which was the complete step across chronological time into timeless shadows, and wonderment in the bleakness of the mortal realm, and the sensation of death kicking at my heels to move on, with a phantom doggin its own heels, and myself hurrying to a plank where all the angels dove off and flew into the holy void of uncreated emptiness, the potent and inconceivable radiances shining in bright Mind essence, innumerable lotus-lands falling open in the magic mothswarm of heaven. I could hear an indescribable seething roar which wasn't in my ear but everywhere and had nothing to do with sounds. I realized that I had died and been reborn numberless times but just didn't remember especially because the transitions from life to death and back to life are ghostly easy, a magical action for naught, like falling asleep and waking up again a million times, the utter casualness and deep ignorance of it. I realized it was only because of the stability of intrinsic Mind that these ripples of birth and death took place, like the action of wind on a sheet of pure, serene, mirror-like water.

Tom Robbins: What is the Meaning of Life?

Our purpose is to consciously, deliberatley evolve towards a wiser, more liberated and luminous state of being; to return to Eden, make friends with the snake, and set up our computers amongst the wild apple trees.
Deep down, all of us are probably aware that some kind of mystical evolution- a melding into the godhead-into love- is our true task. Yet we suppress the notion with considerable force because to admit it is to acknowledge that most of our political gyrations, religious dogmas, social ambitions, and financial ploys are not merely counterprodictive but trivial. Our mission is to jettison those pointless preoccupations and take once again the primordial cargo of inexhaustible ecstasy. Or, barring that, to turn out a good thin crust pizza and a strong glass of beer.

Tony Vigorito: JUST A COUPLE OF DAYS

Rosehips: Goddamnit.
Sweetlicks: Excuse me?
Rosehips: Goddamnit.
Sweetlicks: Why do you say such things?
Rosehips: Why not? It's a satisfying cuss. God is in me as much as anything else, and sometimes God stubs her toe. In saying "Goddamnit," I'm merely disapproving of the location of that book you left lying on the living room floor last night.
Sweetlick: Isn't there a commandment somewhere that says, "Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain?"
Rosehips: Yes, but there are no forbidden words. I know you're a little funnier in the head than I am, but what do you think that commandment means? The name of the Judeo-Christian Ultimate Source is Yahweh. It is a form of the Hebrew verb to be. God is, and thou shalt not take the Is-ness in vain.
Sweetlick: The Is-ness? Is you is or is you ain't my baby?
Rosehips: I is, oh flamma-lamma-ding-damn. but listen, the commandment is reverence. Do not take being in vain. Do not profane existence.
Sweetlick: Goddamn right!

Radiohead: Hail to the Thief

2+2=5

Are you such a dreamer?
To put the world to rights?

I'll stay home forever
Where two & two always
makes up five

I'll lay down the tracks
Sandbag & hide
January has April's showers
And two & two always
makes up five

It's the devil's way now
There is no way out
You can scream & you
can shout
It is too late now
Because

You have not been
paying attention

I try to sing along
I get it all wrong
Ezeepeezeeeezeepeeezee
NOT
I swat em like flies but
Like flies the burgers
Keep coming back
NOT
Maybe not
"All hail to the thief"
"But I am not!"
"Don't question my authority
or put me in the dock"
Cozimnot!
Go & tell the king that
The sky is falling in
When it's not
Maybe not.

(ahh diddums.)

Lewis Carroll: aliCe in Wonderland

"Who are you?" said the Caterpillar.
This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. aliCe replied, rather shyly, "I- I hardly know, sir, just at present- at least I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then."


(see ya soon, hopefully airport security doesn't stick sharp things up my dinghole, in the meantime there's no church near so imma make my own ash for wednesday outta two journal leaves a stick of insence and 50 repetitions of AUM, we'll see how that goes, and why there's hot candle wax all over my chest I just don't know, it must be i'm going blind ahhhhh enough with these pointless strings of meaningless words, enough the voices say!)

Neal Cassady



"Yes!"

The Universe

Images released today from the Hubble Space Telescope show the gigantic Pinwheel galaxy in unprecedented detail. Regions where stars are born are clearly visible in the set. The Pinwheel sits face-on 25m light years away in the constellation Ursa Major, and contains at least a trillion stars, and 100 billion which are probably similar to our sun in heat and lifespan, which may host planets, but even if there are planets in this galaxy suitable for life, it's not possible at the pressent time to even send a a satelite to this area becouse of the great distanse. The galaxy is about 170,000 light-years across, the spiral is about twice the diameter of the Milky Way.